So today is the start of the ninth week on product, exactly half way of the 16 weeks of product only. So I made it through my little tantrum and though I am not on the other side completely, I am close to accepting I can do at least one more week. Well okay one more day.
I know why AA says take it one day at a time, because if you look to far ahead you find that it really isn't worth it. That is all we can do on a diet - one day at a time.
However on a diet the difference is that you don't have immediate results. If you quit drinking for the day you have accomplished that feat with dieting if you diet for a day you may or may not have results. So the heavier you are the harder it is to begin, but easier to stay with it once you have begun.
But it is the initial start up for those who are really obese. The look down the road - my god it will take me years to take this all off. I am going to have to totally change everything about my basic needs to make this happen. And for some - like me - that was just too daunting. On my own I couldn't keep at a diet long enough to make any visible progress. I thought about gastric bypass, but then I found out I had to lose like fifty pounds and I was like if I lose fifty pounds then why wouldn't I just keep going. It would be the jump start I needed. If I lost fifty pounds I could lose it all. And with that thought, I jumped into this program.
When I finished up the first time I had lost about sixty pounds, but I was no where near my goal. For a lot of the people in the group when they finished the product part they finished dieting whether or not they were done losing weight. Me I got that jump start I said I needed to carry forward. And I kept losing weight - all the way to December. Then it stopped.
But I wasn't done. I knew I had this goal in mind, and I wanted to finish. But it was getting too hard. I wanted to live in the real world with real food, and so I maintained, and I got frustrated. So I just wanted to be done. I am done. In my head I know this is it. Eight more weeks. Eight more weeks and I am never going to have to lose more then a couple of pounds at any given point. I am done with this whole dieting mentality. I will never say I am on a diet again. I will ban that word from my vocabulary, it is all about making different choices, and I started to see those choices in January and February and March. I didn't always make the right choices, but I knew when I had chosen poorly, and I learned to compensate. I learned to quit eating even if I didn't want to quit, and if I did quit when I knew I should then everything turned out okay.
Because my body won't tell me to quit, I have to tell myself to quit, and that works for me.
I know why AA says take it one day at a time, because if you look to far ahead you find that it really isn't worth it. That is all we can do on a diet - one day at a time.
However on a diet the difference is that you don't have immediate results. If you quit drinking for the day you have accomplished that feat with dieting if you diet for a day you may or may not have results. So the heavier you are the harder it is to begin, but easier to stay with it once you have begun.
But it is the initial start up for those who are really obese. The look down the road - my god it will take me years to take this all off. I am going to have to totally change everything about my basic needs to make this happen. And for some - like me - that was just too daunting. On my own I couldn't keep at a diet long enough to make any visible progress. I thought about gastric bypass, but then I found out I had to lose like fifty pounds and I was like if I lose fifty pounds then why wouldn't I just keep going. It would be the jump start I needed. If I lost fifty pounds I could lose it all. And with that thought, I jumped into this program.
When I finished up the first time I had lost about sixty pounds, but I was no where near my goal. For a lot of the people in the group when they finished the product part they finished dieting whether or not they were done losing weight. Me I got that jump start I said I needed to carry forward. And I kept losing weight - all the way to December. Then it stopped.
But I wasn't done. I knew I had this goal in mind, and I wanted to finish. But it was getting too hard. I wanted to live in the real world with real food, and so I maintained, and I got frustrated. So I just wanted to be done. I am done. In my head I know this is it. Eight more weeks. Eight more weeks and I am never going to have to lose more then a couple of pounds at any given point. I am done with this whole dieting mentality. I will never say I am on a diet again. I will ban that word from my vocabulary, it is all about making different choices, and I started to see those choices in January and February and March. I didn't always make the right choices, but I knew when I had chosen poorly, and I learned to compensate. I learned to quit eating even if I didn't want to quit, and if I did quit when I knew I should then everything turned out okay.
Because my body won't tell me to quit, I have to tell myself to quit, and that works for me.
Excellent & extremely insightful post!
ReplyDeleteT3's passion & determination came through!
Amen!
ReplyDelete